Moms don't need the Mommy Wars to judge each other — it's somewhat of an occupational hazard. MomSpeaker Brie Latini has been trying to tamp down her proclivity to castigate others' behavior, but she's honest here about the things that unfailingly raise her judgy hackles. Bud don't judge her — what mom can't relate?
I am have been trying, of late, to put aside some of my expectations and attitudes about other people and how they should or should not be living. A lot of this is based on trying to heal my marriage, but it has expanded to include healing me, and finding the part of me that I love — spending time with my friends; putting out a productive, positive energy; and being happy. Emphasis on the latter.
All of that sounds great, of course, and I really am working on it. Really. But Rome wasn't built in a day, and there are still a few things that humans do that make me lose my mind.
- Not putting a seat belt on your child. Oh, no. No, no, no. I will not only judge the ever-loving crap out of you if I see this, but I will also call the cops.
- Being noisy when it's too late or you have been noisy too long. Come on. Things like dogs and babies that don't have a volume button? Not a problem. I can't get upset about an upset animal or a crying child no matter how loud or long. Some things just can't be helped. Even the occasional party or loud music? If it's not a regular thing it's not a problem. Your TV pounding through my floor every night? I think you're an a-hole.
- Failing to yield to a school bus that is boarding/letting off children, particularly if the lights are flashing and the stop sign is out and engaged. You are not only a bad, inattentive driver, but you are also a horrible person. This one, in particular, gives me instant rage. I have been know to yell at drivers who pass the bus while PJ is boarding. They never make eye contact with the braless, crazy-haired woman, still in her jammies, yelling like a nutcase. Go figure.
- Try not to be a Debbie Downer. There are people who have something negative to say as a response to anything. Anything. The sun is shining outside your window and yes, you can get ALL THE CANCER from sunshine. But it's OK enjoy it a little, too. Perk up there, chipmunk.
- Sadness one-uppers also drive me nuts. This is someone who will counter one sad tale with a slightly sadder tale of her own. It's not a competition. Hard is hard, for everyone. Yes, the person who is sad because Amazon didn't send a package on time (me today, as a matter of fact) is in a better place than the person who is sad because she has cancer. But that doesn't give someone a right to invalidate another's feelings. We're not in a race to see who has the suckiest life. Stop it.
I know that all of this makes me sound like a jerk, but in the spirit of honesty (and because writing this out made me laugh) I wanted to share a few things that bug me. What bugs you? Tell me what your pet peeves are in the comments below.
Brie Latini is a South Jersey writer and mom. This post is adapted from her blog ( . . . a breezy life).
