Available Now
MetroKids
Bookmark and Share Email this page Email Print this page Print Edit Module
Jun 4, 2014
06:00 AM
MomSpeak

Why the School Year Needs to End Now!

Why the School Year Needs to End Now!

Skunk: the new late pass

We can see the finish line, but we're not there yet. We heartily agree with MomSpeaker Trish Adkins that snow day makeups have prolonged this school year past the point of sanity. Read Trish's five reasons for ending the school year now, then add your own in the comments section. Together, we'll get through.

The school year needs to end.

NOW.

I know, know, know it snowed. It snowed and we have to have 180 days of school, blah, blah, blah, but really, YOU CANNOT GET TIME BACK.

What has passed has passed and this adding on and extending the life of the school year is inhumane.

I am DONE. The kids are done. The minivan express to School 5 is DONE. Do you know I don't even really look in my 2nd grader's folder anymore? She could be suspended, failing something or need to wear a special pirate-themed outfit every Tuesday until July for "Pirate Spirit Day." I have no idea. And I, frankly, don't care.

1. Today, I woke up to a skunk near the driveway. I cannot leave the home, clearly, yet the 2nd grader is FREAKING OUT she will be late and need a late pass and get in trouble. When I calmly explained that maybe Animal Control can write her a note, she continued to freak out. So I guess the smell of skunk will be her late pass.

2. I am sick of packing school lunches and my daughter has gone on a school lunch hunger strike. A month ago, I would have sent in a giant bag of gummy bears instead of allowing her to buy "Mega Nachos with a Side of Steamed Green Vegetables and a nice Dose of Saturated Fat." Now, despite my best PR efforts, she refuses to indulge in cheeseburger whole wheat spaghetti nachos topped with low sugar Cheez Whiz served by the school cafeteria. I can't handle making one more soy-nut-butter-and-honey sandwich. The knife is simply too heavy and the honey-bear squeeze bottle is clogged. Today I let her pack her own lunch: Which consisted of:

  • Smarties (left over from a Preeclampsia Walk)
  • Pirate Booty (apparently, there is something pirate-themed happening at school)
  • An apple (keeps the doctor away)
  • A piece of bread (very Orange Is the New Black)

3. School pickup is dangerous. Going to the school every day and being nearly knocked over by 500 excited, insane and caged-up children as I attempt to steer two of my three toward the dismissal door for the third is exhausting, dangerous and nearly impossible to navigate in flip-flops. And then there was the death threat (long story) and the general misbehavior of everyone. SCHOOL NEEDS TO END, so the children can get on with playing in the streets, vandalizing things and whining about being bored. It is only natural.

4. The school uniforms no longer fit, have holes, require ironing and are dotted with mystery stains. My children appear as if they have actually been at school for 180 days straight without changing their clothes. It is after Memorial Day and I refuse to iron or spot-treat the stains. I need our wardrobes to be the kind you exclusively wash in the pool. It is bathing suit season; not polo-shirt-knee-length-skirt-season (those skirts have not been knee-length since March).

5.  The end of year hoopla is exhausting. One day, we will wear red to declare we have a heart; another day, we will dress as pirates; then we will need to find a vintage outfit from 1974 and learn a dance routine from Stayin' Alive. Look, I love a good costume. BUT I CAN'T FUNCTION ANYMORE. Can't everyday's theme be: "As long as your booty is covered you are winning!" Or perhaps we can just wear bathing suits. Or wear yellow, for Alex's Lemonade Stand (of course!).

End it now. No. More. School.

Trish Adkins is a South Jersey mom. This post is adapted from blog, Yoke.

Add your comment:
Edit Module
Advertisement

MomSpeak Contributors

Trish Adkins, Yoke
Jennifer Auer, Jersey Family Fun
Chris Bernholdt, DadNCharge
Stacy Heenan Biscardi, Wifty & Shifty
Hillary Chybinski, My Scraps
EJ Curran, Four Little Monsters
Darla DeMorrow, The Pregnant Entrepreneur
Rachée Fagg, Say It Rah-Shay
Raya Fagg, And Starring As Herself…MRSRFKJ
Erin Flynn Jay, Mastering the Mommy Track
Marion Kase, Helicopter-Caterpillar
Jean Ladden, Jean's Book Reviews
Brie Latini, ( . . . a breezy life)
Toni Langdon, Tickles and Time Outs
Lisa Lightner, A Day in Our Shoes
Jeanine Ludwikowski, Mommy Entourage
Jeanne McCullough, Mom Hearts Pinot
Trina O'Boyle, O’Boy! Organic
Kelly Raudenbush, My Overthinking
Lindsey Schuster, Sisters to Sons
Sandra Telep, West Philly Mama
Marissa Kiepert Truong, Land of Once Upon a Time
Lisa Weinstein, The Mixed Up Brains of Lisa Weinstein
Shivaun Williams, Dar Liomsa (In My Opinion)
Paige Wolf, Spit That Out!

If you are a Philadelphia-area parenting blogger and would like to contribute to MomSpeak, please e-mail editor@metrokids.com.

 

Edit ModuleShow Tags

MomSpeak

The voices of local moms
Junior Prom: Crisis Averted

Junior Prom: Crisis Averted

Prom night brings enough drama on its own, without Mother Nature threatening to scuttle the whole darn thing. MomSpeaker Lisa Weinstein breathes a sigh of relief as&nb...

Comments

MomSpeak

The voices of local moms
How Kids Can Pay It Forward

How Kids Can Pay It Forward

"Pay it forward" is a great concept to teach kids. It helps to see the kindness-counts plan in action. MomSpeaker Erin Flynn Jay and her girls were recently PIF beneficiaries. Here's her story.  On Thursday, I took my daughters to Stations of the Cross at a church in the...

Comments

MomSpeak

The voices of local moms
Moms' Book Review: Carrot Saves Easter

Moms' Book Review: Carrot Saves Easter

A local mom's book inspires a new tradition.

Comments

Edit ModuleShow Tags

MK Memo

MK Memo: Moms Know
Snow Day Snowmen

Snow Day Snowmen

MK readers share pics of their snow-day snowman masterpieces!

Comments

Tax Credits for Summer Camp

Tax Credits for Summer Camp

Learn which camp expenses are tax-deductible.

Comments

MetroKids' 2014 Parenting Media Association Awards

MetroKids' 2014 Parenting Media Association Awards

MetroKids won four 2014 Parenting Media Association editorial awards.

Comments

March Preview

March Preview

Vax facts, picking a preschool and what kid must-see masterpieces at the area's art venues in MetroKids' March 2015 issue

Comments

Kids Books: 2015 Caldecott & Newbery Winners

Kids Books: 2015 Caldecott & Newbery Winners

All about the kid lit winners of the 2015 Caldecott and Newbery Medals

Comments