May 9, 2012
The Talk. You know the one.
So, i've been thinking about "The Talk." When Ryan was in 3rd grade, he came home with a mild joke about lesbians that he heard from another 3rd grade boy at school. We didn't go into details, just breezed over that the joke could really make someone feel badly, and he shouldn't repeat it. I mean — I don't think he knows what a "lesbian" is — although we have talked about some kids having two moms. I don't think he knows that "dicks" could be considered a slang term. We tend to use proper names for body parts.
My Way-Back Machine
So I got in my way-back machine and went to 3rd grade. . .Deerfield Township Elementary School in NJ. . .Miss Watts. . .that was the year of the first boy-girl parties where the parents only came into the room to drop off food. I would swear we played 7 minutes in heaven. . .my first kiss. . .3rd grade!! Yikes!
i remember the "movie" — did you see a "facts of life" movie in school? it was about three flowers — and to this day I have no real idea what I was supposed to learn from it. I do recall the permission slips,the classroom door window being covered in constructions paper and the girls and boys being separated. It was 5th grade. . .too late by today's standards? I don't know. . .
I also remember sending away to stayfree for my "starter kit" — I was so happy to get that giant green box of forbidden "womanly" products in the mail. It sat unused until 8th grade — so disappointing after all the build up from the flowers. . . And there was a bee too, I think. . .
My Brother's 'Talk'
My brother is 9 years younger than I am. So I remember when he saw his movie. My mom told my dad that he had seen a movie at school, and my dad should follow-up and see if he has any questions. No lie, here's how it went down outside in the yard:
Dad: So - heard ya saw a movie.
Dad: Got any questions?
That's it. . .done. . .fade to black. . .
I'm still unsure how i learned what it was all about. If I had the talk with my mom, I have totally blocked it out.
i've read all about giving "The Talk" on various parenting sources. But come on. . .how do you start the conversation?
Hillary Chybinski is a crafty mom of 2 boys living the American Dream with her husband in the Philly burbs. This post was adapted from her blog, My Scraps.